Parenting goals can be goals that you set for yourself or you set for your family. Taking the time to really pause and think about parenting and what kind of family you would like to have is creating the blueprint for your family. Having goals offers new hope and allows you to get grounded in what really matters to you. It is good to have goals that are realistic and achievable, but it is also good to have a few long-term goals as well. Here are some goals for the New Year that you may want to add to your own list.
- Stay connected and be present. Commit at least ten minutes of one-one-one time each day with your child. When you are with your kids give them full, happy, device-free attention. Find out about their day, bake with them, read a book, play a game, or spend time together as you tuck them in at night. Protect family dinner. Family meals provide an opportunity to come together and build better relationships. It promotes language and social skills. You can model healthy eating and polite table manners. Studies have also shown that kids who eat with their family at least 3 times a week do better in school. While our lifestyles do not always allow for family dinners every night, make an effort to do it as often as you can.
- Be mindful of screen time. Set limits and make family rules around screen time. The ultimate goal should be teaching your children how to self regulate their time, but this is extremely difficult for most kids and even teens to do without some parent support. Teach the difference between mindless consumption on screens and productive technology. Try to connect with your child in their world, play a video game with them and ask them about their strategies and what they are doing.
- Focus on the positive. You will be surprised that when you focus on the positive, the positive shows up! Use positive hopeful language with your kids. Notice the small things that your child is doing well and let them know you see it and appreciate it.
- Do less for your child and instill more responsibility. Become a less productive parent. Give your child a chance to learn how to be productive in their own lives. Stop packing their lunches, waking them up in the morning, making their beds or breakfast or cleaning up after them. Allow them to develop their autonomy and understand they have control over themselves and the choices they make. Autonomy plays a role in everything a child will do as they grow into adulthood. Giving them a safe space to practice and develop their skills and learn responsibility will be invaluable in their future.
- Prioritize your self-care and take time to recharge. This has been a very difficult time. Parents need to understand that self-care is not an indulgence, it should be a priority and just a part of your life. Those who prioritize self-care are in a stronger position to care for those around them. Self-care is a process and there is no one definition of it. Self-care can take a couple of minutes of your time or take a whole afternoon or day. It is an important way to validate just how difficult parenting can be and how important it is to recharge and focus on ourselves.
